Once upon a time there was a photographer who used a Nikon D40 camera and a lens that could compete with the the Hubble telescope.
His name was Don Juan the photographer extraordinaire. He could create a Rembrandt profile better than anybody else in the world. He used the best lighting to create a perfect picture every time. He could shoot photos while doing back flips. Don Juan was known as a god among men.
One day Don Juan met his match. Shirley Poopar of the Wabba tribe in Tanzania was an amazing photographer. She loved shooting tribe events. Her antecedence was that of Wabbapoopar photographers. Nobody understood where they drew such raw power into each photo.
Don Juan jump kicked Shirley Poopar, but Ms. Poopar managed to capture his soul her camera. Don tried to shoot a photo of her but missed and ended up with a picture of a tigress.
Shirley Poopar showed Don Juan the picture she took of his jump kick. He cried tears of happiness and fear as he saw his soul captured in that camera. Shirley’s Nikon D300 was far superior than that stupid Nikon D40. Don Juan broke his lens over Shirley’s camera and they both quit and became homeless.
The moral of the story is: Don’t mess with Don Juan. He’ll break his lens on your camera. He’s an amazing photographer.
When deciding on which photographer to pick for your special event, don’t piss off Don Juan. If you pick Don Juan, make sure you keep him happy.
Also, don’t ever forget that Shirley will steal your soul with her camera. She’s crazy like that.